Inspiring Our Children

Tim Graves, M.S.Ed.

I recently received a catalog in the mail. In it were a collection of posters, T-shirts, bumper stickers, greeting cards, and books. I tend to enjoy reading these catalogs that are brimming with catchy quotes. Frequently, I read quotes that I like but, alas, they wouldn't end up across my chest or on the bumper of my small station wagon. This time, however, the above quote caught my attention and spoke to me. You see I had had one of those difficult days in the classroom with my students. This time it was with the future-teachers in the college classroom but I have just as often had these days with children in diapers. Despite hours and hours of preparation, I got blank stares. With young children you get squirms and negative behavior. The psychosocial atmosphere in my college classroom was--well, let's just say they were as bored as I was!

I left feeling disillusioned. "I'll never reach these kids! They just don't seem to care! They just don't seem to have any passion! All they care about is their grades!" Then I read my catalog and came to the realization that in my busy-ness of preparing facts to share I had neglected to share my passion for children with the college students. I had failed to provide any vision of why what I droned on and on (and on and on) about mattered to anyone including myself. I had failed to inspire.

I recall similar feelings years ago as an Assistant Teacher in an early childhood classroom. The children bounced off the walls. They hit and bit each other. I spent most of the day disciplining children. "Don't do this! Don't do that!" I was exhausted and disillusioned by the end of the day. I worked for a Lead Teacher who, unfortunately, did not understand child development and planned activities that were full of facts and information. Unfortunately, they required children to sit still or follow directions beyond their developmental abilities. In the name of consistency (and, probably, in the name of preserving my job) I went along. The children suffered and went uninspired.

We play a game in my house I affectionately call Nag or Give-Up. The object of the game for the adults is to be able to walk across the children's bedroom floors without getting the imprint of a Lego on the bottom of your foot or literally smashing a Smashing Pumpkins CD. The game goes something this: I nag, s/he whines, I nag, s/he cleans a bit, I nag, s/he cleans a few more things, I start to nag but decide I can live with a certain level of disaster and, finally, less than twelve-hours later the room returns to its original state of dishevelment and we start over again. This is a common game but not a lot of fun for anyone. We have weeks where we don't play this game because no one ever seems to win. I find it hard to be inspired to nag when nothing ever really changes.

Recently, during one of the weeks that we were too tired to play our game, something supernatural happened! Jessica, my thirteen-year-old daughter, began keeping her bedroom clean. The cleanliness was well above the "acceptable disaster" level. It was actually clean! And without prompting or my nagging! I railed at the stars and the sky hoping the aliens from Vortok 3 would hear me, "Where have you taken my daughter?" I was convinced she had been abducted by aliens and replaced by a look-alike that did not understand the rules of the game. Then I remembered a conversation Jessie, her mother, and I had. I don't recall all the details but the gist of it was, "Show us you are responsible and we can give you the privileges that you seek." The rational explanation for the new behavior was not aliens, but inspiration and motivation. I suspect it also had a lot to do with who initiated the action.

We seem to forget in our drive to educate our own children, the children in our classrooms, and in our interactions with the adults around us that inspiration is such a crucial part of the human species. Most of us will work long hours on something that we deeply believe in or have an interest in. I have seen active 14-month-olds attend to a beloved story for extremely long periods of time. I have seen 3-year olds who never sit still for teacher-initiated group times attend to solving a problem in their play for forty-five minutes or more. I have seen underpaid early childhood staff put in massive amounts of extra work on the weekends and evenings without pay because they believe in the importance of what they are doing. I have seen exhausted, stressed parents come alive in the evening and find the energy to give to their children. The commonality among these people of all ages is that they are inspired and motivated.

I'm headed back into my college classroom next week and I am going to inspire. I feel a passion for meeting the emotional, social, physical and educational needs of children. I know how important well-trained, nurturing educators are in meeting those needs. I will let my passion drive my preparation and teaching so that I might inspire future-teachers. If we use our passion to inspire the children in our classrooms, the adults in the early childhood programs we administer, and our own children growth and learning will indeed occur.

©Copyright, 1997 Timothy R. Graves.  All Rights Reserved. Permission to reproduce for use with parents and families of young children is granted provided no financial gain is involved and this copyright notice is included. Mr. Graves would appreciate any feedback and knowing how and when you use this document. Please let him know by writing Training Wheels for Early Childhood Education at 1981 Decatur Avenue Wheeling, WV 26003 or sending an e-mail to timgraves@trainingwheels4ece.com. Additional articles and handouts can be found at www.trainingwheels4ece.com