Tim's Talk Articles

We Can't Talk About That! As I listen to the teachers, I get a picture of sterile classrooms that hush up young children who try to tell their teachers about the tree they decorated in their home over the weekend....How did we get to the place where Christmas and Chanukah and El Eid are taboo in our classrooms?

The Hat  Our bond is not broken by age, by distance, or by the fact that I am a father rather than a mother.

Kicking Kids Out for Biting? Removing children from child care settings for biting troubles me. It represents our failure as adults to meet the needs of the children in our care—all of them. I don’t like failure as the end of the road; I like failure as an opportunity to grow and improve.

The 6 Cs of Discipline Six basic rules for effective discipline.
 

Allowing Children to Feel "I tried to cheer her up. "You're okay!" "Look at all the new friends you've made." When she didn't begin smiling, I pushed, "You have a lot to be thankful for." I made silly jokes. I was uncomfortable that she was not happy."
 

Another Hazard of Parenting-Parentnoia "Was I right to feel angry at a sick child? That is not the point. I did feel angry."
 

As the Bombs Fell This is my personal reaction to the start of the Iraq War.  I wrote this within the week following the "shock and awe" campaign.
 

Being Human in Front of the Kids This article explores the value of being imperfect parents. The article is geared primarily toward parents.
 

Biting: Dracula at the Day Care This article explores the reasons toddlers bite and outlines several techniques adults can use in dealing with the behavior.
 

Blocks and Computers "...if I could choose only one piece of equipment for my early childhood classroom that I would choose blocks." 
 

Building Democracy in Our Schools and Families This article was published in the summer 2002 issue of The Free School IDEC Magazine. The magazine was part of an effort to bring the International Democratic Education Conference to the United States for the first time in 2003.
 

But What Do We Tell the Children I originally wrote this piece for the families of children in my child care program after the start of the Gulf War. I later updated it the morning after the Oklahoma City bombing. Perhaps, as we face the reality of the attacks today it can also provide some guidance in talking with young children. TG 9/11/01
 

Celebrating Individual Differences This article looks at the small things that you and I do that may create and encourage biased attitudes on the part of our children. The article is geared toward parents and educators.

Contract for Children of Staff Members The following was developed to serve as a framework for communication and to facilitate positive relationships between staff members who have their own children in the programs in which they work and the other adults in the program. This agreement was developed based upon the premise that the children's needs must be paramount.

Cooking with Toddlers and Twos  Sometimes adults react to the suggestion that they should cook with children by talking about the danger of access to hot stoves and ovens. These adults are absolutely correct to be concerned about safety but with a few simple rules and preparation cooking can be a safe, learning activity for young children.

Dear Son, I'm Sorry  "I'm on my way to work now and feeling guilty as only a mother or father can. I lost it with you this morning. I screamed at you so loudly my voice is sore."

Discipline Must Be REAL This recently revised article very briefly outlines the ingredients needed for effective discipline. The article is appropriate for parents and educators.

Going on a Literacy Journey This article originally appeared in the Fall 1999 issue of the NYSAEYC Reporter. The article discusses the importance of early literacy. Originally posted 03/22/04 .

The Hat  Our bond is not broken by age, by distance, or by the fact that I am a father rather than a mother.

Helping Our Children Through Their Fears "Seventeen percent of the people questioned are worried about these creatures with big teeth. Four percent are afraid of the Easter Bunny. Basket loaders--a kind of construction vehicle--are also a scary site to some thirteen percent of the study group."

The Importance of Being Silly

That’s the kind of silly I’m talking about. I really need this kind of silly and, more importantly, our kids really need this kind of silly, too. Still not sure what I’m talking about?

I Wish We'd Never Come on Vacation Spring is coming and summer won't be far behind. This article offers practical tips for family travel.

Inspiring Our Children  "We play a game in my house I affectionately call Nag or Give-Up. The object of the game for the adults is to be able to walk across the children's bedroom floors without getting the imprint of a Lego on the bottom of your foot or literally smashing a Smashing Pumpkins CD." This article is geared toward parents and educators.

Is It Really Work? "As a working parent I'm not sure I always like that definition of work. I want to believe that even when I don't see immediate changes in my children, work is occurring. Growth is happening."

Kicking Kids Out for Biting? Removing children from child care settings for biting troubles me. It represents our failure as adults to meet the needs of the children in our care—all of them. I don’t like failure as the end of the road; I like failure as an opportunity to grow and improve.

Letting Go "SO HOW DO WE "LET GO"? It's hard to "let go" but it is our job. It is our job to prepare our children to be independent adults."
 

Many Faces of Professional Development This article originally appeared in the Spring 2000 issue of the NYSAEYC Reporter. Tim uses personal stories to summarize the variety of professional development available to early childhood educators. Originally posted 03/22/04 .

My Son, The Action Hero "I believe that each of us is responsible for teaching our children that they can indeed make a difference. Sometimes that means listening to our children and assisting them in taking actions even when we think we're too busy." This article is geared toward parents.
 

Open-Ended Questions "Open-ended questions are wonderful tools that promote children's creative thought, problem-solving skills, and cognitive growth. Use open-ended questions, such as those below, often and in multiple areas of the curriculum."

An Open Letter to the Premier  "I am deeply concerned that the accreditation of the Booroobin Sudbury School in Maleny is being threatened.  The Booroobin Sudbury School is an excellent example of a democratic school that offers families a valid, credible choice for the education of their children."

Protests & Snipers I wrote this unpublished letter to the Albany Times Union about my own children's social-activism.

Raising a Moral Child Major influences on the learning of moral values and the process of reconciliation and making amends.

Reflection: Infant Spirituality

If the birth of children is such a spiritual experience for men, is it possible that it is not just fathers but the infant who is having a spiritual experience? 

Review: Nanny 911 Offers Sound Advice; Limited Support  Despite the generally sound advice, I am concerned that the families may not be given enough support for their new beginnings toward better behavior. 

Risky Business This article originally appeared in the Summer 2000 issue of the NYSAEYC Reporter. The article discusses the importance of risk in creativity for teachers and children. Originally posted 03/22/04.

Roadblocks to Effective Parent-Teacher Relationships This is a "how not to" article for teachers. Parents may want to be interested, too, but the article is geared to teachers.

Self-Correcting Children "Just as a self-correcting toy indicates when a mistake is made, children often indicate when a parenting or teaching mistake is made."
 

Sleeping During the First Year In question and answer format this article looks at sleep habits during the first year from a practical angle. This article geared toward parents is also quite useful for teachers of the very young.

Thriving With More Than One This article outlines practical steps for helping each of the siblings in your home. This article is geared to parents.
 

Tools for Learning: Blocks and Computers This article originally appeared in the Spring 2001 issue of the NYSAEYC Reporter. The article looks at a variety of classroom tools and discusses their appropriateness for young children. Originally posted 03/22/04 .

When Did He Learn to Use the Dictionary? "My daughter turned 13 this week. Jessie's a brilliant, charming, witty child--excuse me--teenager. I still vividly recall her hand closed around my forefinger and her big blue eyes staring up at me moments after her birth."

We Can't Talk About That As I listen to the teachers, I get a picture of sterile classrooms that hush up young children who try to tell their teachers about the tree they decorated in their home over the weekend....How did we get to the place where Christmas and Chanukah and El Eid are taboo in our classrooms?

©Copyright, 1998-2000, 2001, 2002-2006 Timothy R. Graves. All Rights Reserved. Permission to reproduce any of the above articles for use with parents and families of young children is granted provided no financial gain is involved and this copyright notice is included. Mr. Graves would appreciate any feedback and knowing how and when you use this document. Please let him know by writing Training Wheels for Early Childhood Education at 1981 Decatur Avenue Wheeling, WV 26003 or sending an e-mail to timgraves@trainingwheels4ece.com. Additional articles and handouts can be found at www.trainingwheels4ece.com